Gastronography – Victoria Sponge’s Secret

There are some things that 50 year old blokes are just not supposed to do. Looking at full fat cakes is one of them. As for actually eating them, Jaysus!, send for mid-life-crisis counselling services immediately.

Every man has to eat, regularly. So more important than any sight seeing itineraries, will be the business of re-stocking the picnic hamper. This aspect of consumption logistics, of where and when to grab hold of the naughtiest but nicest of forbidden local fruits, now takes centre stage of the planning process.

Here is a gallery of  X-rated gastronography detailing our desirable forbidden fruit cakes and dens of cholesterol inducing iniquity, provided we can prevent our loved ones, and more importantly our GPs, from finding out what we’re intending on getting up to.

Copenhagen – Laura’s Bakery at Torvehallerne


Stockholm Wiener Konditoriet

This one has both kumquat and physalis in it. If that doesn’t get us into some serious trouble then nothing will.


Berlin – Albrecht’s Patisserie

Give us a Kirsch




Budapest – Auguszt Cukraszda


Lisbon – Pasteis de Belem

A tasty Portuguese tart


Paris – Ladurée 


Brussels is actually our first port of call, but there is a limit to the number of dietary sins we can commit in any given 24 hour period, so we’ll be concentrating on confectionery in the lowlands. My research suggests that Marcolini and Frederic Blondeel are perhaps the ultimate indiscretions, but we dont really have time to make the neccessary detours to these guys. More attainable for our tempo are Corné and Neuhaus ,  who are nevertheless artisanal hauts chocolatiers, i.e not to be sniffed at. If you like choccies, but have never eaten the real thing, beware!. Crack cocaine doesn’t even get a look in once you’ve tried this stuff.

We will also be visiting Regoli Pasticceria in Rome, specifically for their wild berry torte.

Planning Update

Belgrade to Sarajevo

No news is bad news as far as  the Belgrade to Sarajevo train goes. Croatian Railways have decided they dont fancy doing international trains anymore, which considering the geography  of the country, is bad news for anyone in Hungary wanting to go southwest, not much better for anyone in Serbia wanting to go northwest, and very bad indeed for anyone in Bosnia and Herzegovina wanting go anywhere at all.

There was an immediate outcry after the Croats dropped this timetabling bombshell, and there is now at least one service from Sarajevo to Zagreb, and several from  Belgrade through Croatia and on to Slovenia and Austria. But there’s no news of any reprieve for either of the two services that ran up the Bosna valley from east Croatia up to Sarajevo, including our direct service that ran from Belgrade.  As soon as I get definitive news I’ll broadcast it in here.

When in Rome, Buy Food

I have finally thrown the towel in on getting supplies delivered to us in Milan or Tirano.  We’re going to be in Milan before the locals have really got going, and we wont be in Tirano long enough to do the job justice. So we are going to stock up the night before in Rome. I have found Volpetti’s, who are open till 20:15, and are also within walking distance of the Circo Massimo. The Sun will set at 20:41 that day, and that’s exactly the time we need to be at the local derelict sports stadium. We’ll probably get the No. 3 tram a few stops from right outside the deli to the the Roman rubble region.


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